How to Ride a Helicopter for Free

Helicopters are cool. When you ride in one, it’s like you’ve become a bird soaring through the air.


When I was five years old, I took a helicopter ride for free. This is how I did it.

  1. Be born with a congenital heart defect.
  2. Get open-heart surgery at five years of age.
  3. Have a successful surgery, but experience a near death experience (NDE) after that.
  4. Come back to this life.
  5. Show signs of a full recovery and return home 400 miles away.
  6. Have a fever of 105 degrees and get an ice bath.
  7. Rush to the airport to fly back to the hospital 400 miles away.
  8. Miss the flight.
  9. Find an emergency helicopter to take you to the hospital.
  10. Tell your parents you’re feeling much better, then enjoy the helicopter ride!

If you’re reading this, it’s probably too late for you to follow the above steps. But there’s always the next life!

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